Author Archives: Pure Derry

BREAKING : Gregory Campbell rushed to Hospital

Gregory Campbell has been rushed to Altnagelvin after busting several blood vessels in his temples upon hearing that the BBC were to start a new Saville Enquiry. “Relax Gregory!” we reassured him when he phoned Pure Derry to complain from A&E. “It’s about that celebrity fella, Jimmy Saville!”. “Oh right” he muttered. “That’s the lead

Local News Roundup

~ Nick Griffin has caused a storm with controversial comments on Twitter during his visit to Belfast. The BNP leader, famous for his extreme views on immigration to Britain, was visiting Ulster to support the Orange Order, an organisation famous for celebrating a successful immigration to Ireland. ~ Police are looking to speak to a

Dear Majella: Letter From James Mc Clean

Dear Majella, A rumour has started to spread in Derry that I’m going to buy The Bogside Inn. Being from Creggan, this is something of an embarrassment to me and my family obviously. My Da is already getting dirty looks up at the Telstar, and me Ma was asked three times in the town the

Dear Majella: August

Dear Majella, I’ve been starting to feel like a bit of a weirdo lately because I have developed some unusual habits. I’m a 34 year old single fella, and I haven’t had much luck with the ladies the last few years, despite the fact that my mum always buys me nice clothes and I’ve got

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